Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Worrying About 'Tomorrow'

This post probably would have made more sense if I had written it yesterday.... but yesterday I was so worried about 'tomorrow', I couldn't manage to compile my thoughts!

I work out of my house, yet on Monday I STILL e-mailed my boss, telling him I 'wasn't coming to work'... Can you do that when you work out of your house??? Well, I did and the world is still turning, so we're gonna take that as a positive sign! Over the weekend, both boys contracted the flu, and with it 11 loads of laundry, and 6 baths in 3 days. Then I got it... BAD! Then Kevin got it... Bad! I am now out of laundry detergent, and have given serious thought to creating a Lysol holster for my belt!

Tuesday. I'm catching up on work, praying both boys don't relapse, and we make it to 2pm when the boys head down for their naps, and Tonya, the woman who helps our world go round, is about to depart. Tonya has been a God send these first 6 months we've been here... The boys adore her, we trust her implicitly, she has helped to make our transition seamless. Tonya has goals for her life, and its become clear to her that an 8-2pm chunk of time M-F doesn't leave much to realize those goals in.... so now we are in limbo with her. I fully support her finding what it is that will make her happy, but can't deny there is a selfish part of me that had grown comfortable with our routine.

Enter my Facebook post from Tuesday Night: "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for it will worry about itself. Each day has enough troubles of its own" (I Googled it after the fact, and learned that verse comes from Matthew 6:34)

Yesterday I was worried about my family being sick, losing an amazing care provider for my boys, launching my first small group (today: Wednesday) as a co-leader (SUPER Scary), the house hunt we've just begun, and all the financial changes that will result in.

Yesterday I worried about a lot, and it did me NO good. None of my circumstances immediately changed as a result of my worry, it pretty much just festered, grew, and ultimately robbed me of a good evening. So today, I'm not gonna worry. If I look over the last 10 years of my life, all I can see are the little ways God stepped in gave me more than I could have hoped for: Meeting Kevin, majoring in Supply Chain, Moving to Austin, Dell, UT, Gateway Community Church, Caleb, Logan, internships for Kevin, offers/options, Oracle, and now DC, and our new church family here. There IS a plan, I just need to practice a little faith... WAY tougher to actually execute than write about!

1 comment:

  1. wow! i am sure jealous of your new small group! i KNOW that yall will be GREAT leaders! YAY!

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