Thursday, May 2, 2013

I'm a Hippie.... Who knew?!?

As a senior in High School, I'd pegged my 10 year plan as single in a big city, climbing the corporate ladder. This outlook was well within the realm of possibility.  My parents had nick-named me the 'black widow' in regards to dating, having broken up with any relationship that began to approach the 6 month mark, and I avoided babysitting like the plague.

How I ended up a hippie, is a mystery.

I hadn't given much thought to this until today.  I was driving home from my mid-wife appointment, having just discussed the new Essential oil regimen I'd use to accommodate our natural birth plan, and manage my families health holistically, and realized I still needed to sign-up for the Homeschooling Conference to get curriculum for Cub this fall.  The writing was on the wall, I couldn't deny it.

Much to my mother's dismay, I don't wear socks, almost ever.

Any chance I get, I open our home up to have people live with us, and have confessed on more than one occasion that a commune sounded like a very fun way to live.

If you asked Kevin, he'd make an argument that I shower as often as a hippie... lies.... everyone knows every other day, with an occasional slip to a third day, is better for hair care.  That's my argument and I'm sticking with it!

When people say kid's change everything.... they weren't kidding!  They force you to learn things you'd rather remain ignorant towards, and ask questions you never thought you'd ask.  Before kids, I would never have challenged a Dr's diagnosis or prescription.  They went to school for EVER for this... surely they knew what was best.  However after having a child, and realizing the Dr's 'extensive' education left them with little more constructive advice than "let's TRY this.... if it doesn't work, come back in a week and we'll TRY something else"... When putting toxic chemicals into my kids, or doing a spinal tap at 2wks old for a fever because it was 'protocol', and then holding us hostage in the hospital for 4 days and $5K....   I started asking questions... doing research.... Don't have it figured out yet, but I'll keep ya' posted on the results of this new Essential Oil gig I'm trying.

Even before we had kids, I always looked forward to when I could just 'help' at the school vs. being solely responsible for them. The thought of them kinda freaked me out!  Needless to say, Home Schooling was no where on my radar.  However as Cub approached schooling age, my questions started, and to be honest I wasn't liking most the answers I got.  The political system, which I so adore (gag), had essentially bound all public schools to teach what they deemed appropriate.  I'm not convinced 'politics' and 'appropriate' should ever be used in the same sentence.  The private sector wanted to charge collegiate prices to teach my son how to spell.  If that weren't enough I had this nagging inkling that it was in "The Plan" for us.  You know "THE PLAN".... the one you fight, convinced God got the files swapped with some other woman, and surely if He knew you at all, He would not ask you to walk THIS plan out.   I've sent my complaint and question in for review, but He's playing this one close to the vest.... figures.

On second thought, I guess kids don't change EVERYTHING.   While I'd love to claim altruistic reasons behind our plans for a natural birth, this time.... "It IS all about the money money money, cha-ching, cha-ching...".  I think I caught the mid-wife a bit off guard during our first pre-natal check-up when she asked the innocent question of why we chose a birth center birth this time... my response "My last two births were fast, and if I have to grin and bare it to save $4K, well that's what I'll do".   It was quiet in the room for a couple minutes after that.  Awkward.   They seem to like me well enough now, although there was another awkward pause when she asked me today if I'd given any thought to my birth plan, and my response was "Have a baby".... apparently other people put more thought into this :).

While Kev would probably like me to adopt more fully the hippie practices and take the family closer to the vegan meal planning, I'm gonna have to warn him that dairy and meat are about the only thing separating me from dreads, flowy skirts, and Birkenstocks!

What a difference a decade makes... from 'single in the city' to hippie living w/ 3 babes and 9 years of marriage to the love of my life.    Yes God... The irony is not lost on me, thank you for pointing out the superiority of your plan.... however I'm still waiting on comment regarding your PLAN for keeping my children alive and me sane through Home Schooling.

Crickets..... Funny.... very funny.


4 comments:

  1. Love it! I can only imagine the look on the midwives faces :)

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  2. I love you more and more each day. Love this post, you are hilarious. I can't wait to learn more about homeschooling and heck, by the time my little one is ready for school you will have had 5 years of practice, so I can get all of my advice from you!

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  3. love ya, hippie girl! you are the "one push wonder"!!!! you were MADE for natural childbirth! this post had me crackin up, bcs the one lesson i have learned in life is to never say never!

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  4. Yea for natural birth!! You can totally do it!

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