The Accidental Play Date

World War Z's got nothing on my house these days....  Except I feel like the zombie, and my children are on the war path.  You would think the zombie status has something to do with sleepless nights attributed to a newborn... you would be wrong.  AJ is a freaking child prodigy when it comes to sleep and has been giving us 12 hour nights for 2.5wks now, so I'm not sleepless, just battle weary.   This only added to my total anxiety after seeing the world's 'back to school' pics, that I have forever screwed up our lives by not enrolling Cub in Kindergarten.   So God and I had a little heart to heart today, which looked a lot like me hitting my head while plugging my ears as an escape from the RIDICULOUS NOISE in my house.  Since the decibels in this house have been rivaling that of a scream-o  concert, we've been spending quite a bit of time outdoors, in a weak attempt to salvage any portion of my hearing and sanity.  However, the parks haven't been doing much to assuage my anxiety about homeschooling, given Cub is like a foot taller than any other kid at the playground, with them all back in school..... Until today!

God must have sensed my rapidly approaching major freak out, cause we ventured out to the park today, and first thing I noticed were some boys Cub's size playing.  Then my ears perked up as two of the mom's talking nearby were talking about their home school curriculum.  If women ever fully outgrow the initial insecurities of approaching other women strangers, I wouldn't know yet.  I did that slow awkward walk over, where its kinda obvious you're approaching them, but trying not to draw attention to yourself yet.  Then when you are obviously lurking and they finally look your way, you almost act surprised they looked your way... my winning introduction went something like this "oh hi, how are you, just happened to notice you were talking about homeschooling stuff"  (maybe I noticed cause I've heard every word you've both said for the last 5 minutes, but don't mind me).  People think I'm outgoing, and I am, but for the record it doesn't make the initial introductions any less awkward.

It was awesome!  These women welcomed me immediately into their conversation, their kids are right at the same ages as mine, and they have a regular Wednesday morning play date, where the 4 of them and their collective 12 kids get together to play.  They also let me know of the even bigger gathering that occurs every Friday at another local park!  Wahoo!   Now I don't have to be the creepy school playground person, that hangs at the local school to hit recess so my kids can play with people their own age range....  We did that once last week.... it was weird, I don't recommend it.  I think the only reason they didn't call the cops on me was because I had a baby strapped to my chest, something about those non-threatening infants.

Confession time.... until today, I hadn't opened the boxes of home school curriculum we got, to be honest, they seriously freaked me out.  We've been working on the "Teaching Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lesson's" book all summer, and that had been what I was counting as our 'school' up till now.  After our accidental play date, I was encouraged to bite the bullet, came home and opened them up.  I reviewed the first few weeks/months of content while the boys had quiet/nap time and was SO excited to see that most of the material is stuff I feel pretty confident with Cub's performance in reading now, that he'll grasp quickly!

No matter how many times you hear/learn that you will get 'attacked' as you try to follow God's plan for your life, when you finally get that confirmation that you're on the right path, it feels SO good!  So thankful for the accidental play date today!  NOW.... if He would just weigh in on how to get two miniature humans to love each other rather than contrive new and devious ways to annoy the other and me in the process, we'd REALLY be onto something!

AJ's Newborn Pics!

I've determined new born photography is an act of masochism for moms.  It's just not natural in that first week to find the energy and perfect timing, to have napped and fed your new born into oblivion so you get sweet malleable mush baby for pictures.  THEN transform the exhausted mama mess into something you'd be willing to hang on your wall and look at for years to come!  When you add a couple more kids to the mix and have to keep their clothes clean and negotiate smiles under said exhausted state, your house becomes such a pleasant place..... Ha!

Despite all of THAT.... we did it.... again :)   And AGAIN, I'm so happy we did.  My girlfriend Michelle, an incredible wedding photographer offered to help me capture some images of our family that first week.  I have to laugh at the ridiculousness of the illusion the pictures create.... a peace filled home where we're all put together, smiling, and oh how quiet a picture is... quiet.... what is THAT?   I looked like that for all of one hour that day.... as soon as the camera was put away, I was back in pajama's and I think I took a two hour nap, totally spent at having created an image I'd be willing to hang on the wall.  I wanted to share some of the awesomeness that was created, cause I just LOVE them, and all the handsome men I get to be surrounded by now!

 Thanks Michelle VanTine Photography for the amazing pic's  I LOVE them!!!!  

The Unofficial Guide to being a REAL Man

Last night I went out with the girls.  At one point our conversation turned toward men, and we mused for awhile over this conundrum:  A staggering collection of intelligent, confident, faith filled, successful, and beautiful single women are available, and no MEN are pursuing them.  Collectively we didn't come up with much of a conclusion.... it remained a mystery.  Until this morning.

I stumbled across this article "The Unofficial Goldman Sachs Guide to Being a Man", and about choked on my breakfast.

(The remainder of my post won't make much sense till you read it)

Dear God.... if this is what it means to be a man in our world today.... Lord help us...

As I read through it, I became more and more convinced they got the title wrong, and it should have been the Unofficial Guide to Being a Pompous Ass, or overgrown Frat Boy.  I find it interesting, the term was never "Frat Man"... maybe it was because subconsciously everyone knew that behavior wasn't indicative of what it meant to be a man.  That might be a bit of a harsh assessment... there were a FEW legit points in there.... a VERY few.

Yes the 'Times New Roman in the streets wingding in the sheets girl' DOES exist, but if you think she would be interested in the 'man' this list suggests, you would be sorely mistaken.  The list sounded like a great start, if your goal in life is to star in the cast of Mad Men, or be a career bachelor.  However, if you want to be a REAL man, one that can not only catch a girls eye, but hold it indefinitely, an entirely different list should be consulted.

I'm not offering myself up as any expert, but I've been married to a REAL man for going on 10 years, and I've experienced the attributes that not only caught me, but continue to make me swoon over a decade later.  Not one has to do with an affinity for whiskey, expensive sunglasses, cash in a front pocket, or accruing an impressive wine collection for our children.

So.... mostly serious (and with some humor) I offer up: The Unofficial Woman's Take on Being a Real Man:

• First, if you're looking for that 'Times New Roman in the streets' girl.... you better be well versed in it yourself... Have some integrity, its not fair to court the good girl, while you're playing the bad boy.  
• Be confident your self-worth is not tied to your net-worth.... if a woman makes you think otherwise, don't bother with her, she's got her own lessons to learn.
• Open doors and give up your seats when necessary... always
• Don't make wide spread generalizations about people, it only serves to highlight your ignorance.
• Be the first to forgive.
• Fight only for what you would give your life defending, little else is worth it.
• Admit mistakes
• Don't use words like 'murse', 'manscape', or 'bromance' in any serious conversation
• Don't be intimidated by another's success, celebrate it, no matter the race, class, gender, or age.
• Aspire to serve someone other than yourself
• When you look at a woman.... see her like this.
• Man up..... Women are just as scared of 'til death do us part as men are.  We aren't trying to 'trap' you, but who is supposed to be helping whom overcome fears... There is nothing sexier than a man who steps up in the face of fear, and can calmly lead another through it.
• Don't be afraid to start a marriage/family younger than you think is 'wise'.... Building a life with someone, is just that.... a building process.  With each layer of work the structure get's stronger and stronger, and all who contribute are vested in its success.  Its not the same if you build something and just invite another person in to see what YOU have built... if they didn't build it with you, its as easy to see them in as it is to see them out.
• Live for a legacy, not a livelihood... meaning be there for your family... they are your people, your tribe, and you are the leader.... LEAD... when its not fun, when no one wants to follow, whenever.
• When the time comes: Cook, do laundry, scrub a toilet, and babysit: for a few hours, over night, for the weekend, whatever.... Its not glamours, you won't end up on the cover of GQ for it, but your woman will stand in awe of you and sing your praises to anyone that will listen.
• Don't complain.... Do something to make it better
• and yes.... #StopItWithTheHashtags

There are probably at least 100 other things my girlfriends could contribute, and ladies feel free, cause it would appear the men could use an alternative point of view on what we see as attractive!

6wks down.... 6 to go

I've been on maternity leave for going on 6wks, and have mentally composed about 1000 blogs, then the end of the day comes and I crawl into a bag of chocolate chips (err.... bed... I mean bed) and stay there for awhile.  The chocolate chips aren't doing much to get my pre-baby-body back, but I keep telling myself that's what these next 6wks are all about.... it would sound more convincing if I wasn't munching on some M&M's while typing this.  Meh.... I got all three kids down for naps at the same time, if that isn't worthy of a little celebratory M&M munching, then really nothing is!

It's been a blur... seriously... We've been to water parks, zoo's, museums, Virginia Beach, Pittsburgh, and Michigan, and have seen just about every single one of our existing extended family members!  The house is under construction... FINALLY... after our two month long plumbing nightmare, and Kevin just started his new job.... its been a busy 6wks!

The side effects are quite noticeable between Cub and Logan.... They've gone off the rails.  We've blurred the lines of reality, and fun 'new baby' life, and they've lost their compass.  Case and point, Logan's three day bender of coloring on all manner of surfaces that are NOT paper.  "Bender's" have a slightly different definition when you're three years old.  First it was an orange sharpie on my dad's white exterior siding of his house.... awesome.  Next, we had green marker on the floor of a school supply store, luckily that was easily remedied.  Unfortunately last nights crayon to his bedroom wall and dresser looks like it may require a bit more attention.  Not to be outdone, Caleb is having a great time excising his 'big brother' status and letting us know what he will and will not be doing.  He forget's who he's messin with... not gonna fly wee man.  He had his own minor infraction at the school supply store, walking out with a fancy little eraser (by accident I'm sure), but we got a good teachable moment outta that one, when he had to walk back in and explain to the lady what he'd done, apologize, and ask for forgiveness.  To top all that off, Logan decided to just pee on the floor this morning, despite having a diaper on, and being a few feet from the bathroom, the floor apparently seemed like a better option.   Yes, the wheels have come off.  I'm strongly considering solitary confinement..... for myself.....but this 2 hour nap, that all three are taking, will have to suffice.

It's been 6 weeks of anything goes.  It's been crazy, but its been a blast too.  Sure we're paying a small price right now with a week or two where we batten down the hatches, and remind the lil men that yes, order will be restored, anarchy will not be tolerated.  Then I've got 6 more weeks, which I know will FLY by way too fast, where we find this new groove we'll operate in.... I'm excited.... and freaking out a little bit.  A tidal wave of panic hit as everyone else's kiddo started Kindergarten and I wondered for the 6,874th time if I'm doing the right thing.   Then I have to remind myself to breath, this isn't permanent, and thank God for other 'spicy mama's' out there that march to the beat of their own drum and are certain they are raising career criminals as a result of the parenting choices as well!

For those that missed it earlier, I posted 'our' first day of school pictures as well.....  Not your typical "Big Yellow Bus" picture, and I'm fairly certain Cub's lesson was somewhat atypical for Kindergarten curriculum as well....  I'm thinking this will just serve as a useful documentation for any punk that wants to call my kid a weirdo for homeschooling.....   Sure we may be weird.... but we are also quite bad ass!